Artifice, I have noticed that you are a new competitor
& this first showing is quite impressive for an AOWL beginner.
my guess is you are not new to topicals because it shows
your word choice is nice & you never seemed to rush the flow
it took me a second & third read to fully gather my thoughts
from the beginning you set it up nicely because it answers a lot
my first thought was just another cowboy out in the mountains
but after looking deeper I see *Death* is your subject & wow...kid...
you really impressed me although some of the wording is clunky
it took me a second to overlook it but overall this is a real fun piece
I felt the ending could have been different but oh well...
love that *pales in comparison* line you added that in so well!
nice work
Asylum, ahh the man that has placed me in such a small cell to grow
Im glad you are back online again & all I have to say is....welcome home.
your piece was quite amazing & really showcased some skilled narrative
you shed light on a journalists journey into the world of the perilous..
although I found some of your wording to be kind of weird for the most part
you still brought a chilling tale to the table & to me that really goes far
I for one...think that the use of *fluttering* was out of place in this piece
I feel like that word is commonly associated with butterflies to say the least...
otherwise you really brought your A game *I blame the cough syrup*
but I enjoyed the piece nonetheless, good show boss...word up...
v/Asylum, this was a great battle from a newcomer & the leagues coordinator
it was hard choosing a winner because both brought their own different flavor
the tale Artifice brought was twisted with some great lines & interesting concepts
but Asylum had a stronger verse by the way it had continuously progressed
this would be my choice for BOTW because both styles clash nicely against the other
I feel like this would be a close one due to the way they compliment each other...
otherwise....Asylum comes out on top for having a stronger plot & interesting ending
although I do applaud Artifices first showing...cheers mate...to an interesting beginning
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.....laugh....and the world laughs with you
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