[Alice White]

I partially agree with the feed which is already given.
I thought that your initial complex of a flex type of piece was nice, but this seemed rather random and quite short to really have some sort of substance. The scheme you employed was quite decent, though, would be good to see some enhancement of it in terms of having a thorough emphasis on internals and multis. I don't find the rhymes overly basic, tough, it's just more of a rather vague slant rhyming approach, imo.