Netcees - View Single Post - Schadenfreude 1-1 Vs Muff 1-1

Pinot Grij · 01-23-2016, 02:23 PM

Schad
Opener is cool, but a lot of wordiness to get to a pretty straightforward concept. Not saying it was weak, but less would've been more in this case.
BBW line was not great
Herd line is alright
Ok, getting a little overkill on the fat chick jokes
ZZ German is a big stretch - and making fun of someone for being German when your username is a German word is not a strong play
Nazi line? I did nazi that coming! That's the oldest joke in the book

Muff
shovel / grave - ok
"sent 2 another time" is the diss in this line, which isn't that hard in the end
I don't know wtf faraday caged means
Ok - pick up game is pretty comical - points for that
Molly concept is ok
Again - I don't know wtf trepanning is - I guess it's cutting a hole in someone's skull, but who knows that shit?

Honestly pretty disappointed by this one and I can't just not vote on it cuz I already wrote all this shit. In the end, Pick Up Game was LOTB for me. I think Schad had a chance if he didn't go so hard on fat girl jokes. A little variety is the spice of life, my dude.

Vote -- Muff

01-23-2016, 02:23 PM	#10
Pinot Grij Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Posts: 863 Battle Record: 23-19 Accomplishments - OM HOF Champed - Fight Night 2 - Write Week V - Netcees Battle League (2x) - Winter Topical II - 1-2 Punch league Rep Power: 29195064	Schad Opener is cool, but a lot of wordiness to get to a pretty straightforward concept. Not saying it was weak, but less would've been more in this case. BBW line was not great Herd line is alright Ok, getting a little overkill on the fat chick jokes ZZ German is a big stretch - and making fun of someone for being German when your username is a German word is not a strong play Nazi line? I did nazi that coming! That's the oldest joke in the book Muff shovel / grave - ok "sent 2 another time" is the diss in this line, which isn't that hard in the end I don't know wtf faraday caged means Ok - pick up game is pretty comical - points for that Molly concept is ok Again - I don't know wtf trepanning is - I guess it's cutting a hole in someone's skull, but who knows that shit? Honestly pretty disappointed by this one and I can't just not vote on it cuz I already wrote all this shit. In the end, Pick Up Game was LOTB for me. I think Schad had a chance if he didn't go so hard on fat girl jokes. A little variety is the spice of life, my dude. Vote -- Muff __________________ Topical C.R.E.A.M.