Lotto - decent concepts, but I think you got tripped up by wordiness.
Quote:
ya girl so ugly, it must be why u don't fuck her lately
bitch got bulldog features that could star her alongside phill on the pet show w/ dr Katy
got thugs that'll shoot for me so TRUST u don't want that heat bro
cus if nika start I'll lift my arm n the iron'll raise quicker than if I we're magneto
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you could probably carve decent punches out of these, but as they are, they don't hit that hard cuz the wording waters down the heft of the punch.
nik-A - thought the opener coulda been more direct. Scraps/leftovers is cool. Setup on the Pee Wee Herman line was weird - "they mouth to see me freed". Clouds/water down was cool too.
Vote -- nik-A with better execution, more polish.