~Dream Battle – Top Two Verses of Round~
Submitted by Pinot Grij
01-11-2016
Rd. 1 Winter Topical II
I’ll take the Intercontinental Belt back. Take it back to Parts Unknown. Load the spaceship with the rocket fuel. Then load it with the Warriors.”
- The Ultimate Warrior
Jared loves astronomy and professional wrestling
Two topics with no common ground, you’re probably guessing
With his telescope, he held out hope as he checked out the moon
That its celestial dunes were some kind of extraterrestrial ruins
Until that one night, he glimpsed within the moonlight’s glorious bask
Upon its rocky surface, there emerged the Ultimate Warrior’s mask!
Once the euphoria passed, he watched with a gleam in his eyes
Like a beam in the night, the mask whimsically careened through the skies
It was the Warrior ship! Jared thought, “Is this really happening?”
And like some astral dream, he was pulled in by its tractor beam
Through sliding doors he made his way to the ship’s command center
Then gasped, all the crew mates were his favorite dead wrestlers!
Macho Man, Eddie Guerrero, Owen Hart and Rick Rude
The British Bulldog, Mr. Perfect - now there was a slick dude!
There the Warrior said, “We never died, Jared, this was our destiny.
To protect Earth from subterranean aliens who are great at wrestling!
That’s why I had my vessel bring our sport’s most massive fan
To give you a front row seat to our huge event at Saturn Slam!”
Jared couldn’t believe his eyes - he swore never to blink
As he watched his former heroes all enter the ring
He saw Mr. Perfect grab his alien foe around its purple neck
And held it as it struggled to escape from the Perfect-plex
Macho Man defeated his opponent and after he pinned him
He put on his shiny cowboy hat and snapped into a Slim Jim
Ravishing Rick Rude faced a truly gruesome, heinous thing
But stole his girlfriend after he snapped him in the Rude Awakening
Then the Warrior took the ring in a 20-Man Battle Royale
And as the last man standing, he grabbed the mic with his patented growl
“I may be the champion, but I couldn’t win this match myself
I owe it all to Warrior Jared for reclaiming the Intergalactic Belt!”
Jared’s passion swelled, he couldn’t even fathom his fame
But he felt on top of the world as the superstars all chanted his name
It’s all a dream. Jared is a lonely boy clutching his only toy
An Ultimate Warrior action figure, his yard sale pride and joy
See, his brothers would beat him while his mom was at work
Those jerks took their anger from the divorce out on his self-worth
It was mean, his brothers put him in the Million Dollar Dream
But he wouldn’t fall asleep, they’d just hold it as he screamed
He’d think, “At school, when they pick teams nobody selects me.
I get beat up at every recess and nobody protects me.
Most nights when I go to sleep my stomach is empty.
If I died, I think everybody in the whole world would forget me.”
He held his Warrior toy and cried that night with hard sobs
His stupid brother had gotten angry and broke both of the arms off
So he looks upwards at the sky for shooting stars, he’s never seen one
And he dreams of escaping a world that will never let him be one
VS.
Submitted by Cimmerian
01-04-2016
Rd 1 Winter Topical II
6.12.94
Twelfth of June. I can still smell her perfume
Listening—bacon sizzling—morning cartoons
These technicolor memories adorning my room—
While the rain is pouring, this mourning's for you
The warm squeezes—melted me—grilled cheeses
The borders we worked around—puzzle pieces
Picture perfect—every day that the Earth twists
Flowers in the garden, calling me your Orchid
She could thread a needle in a blink of an eye
The same speed disease unraveled her mind
"In God's hands," but God damn, hers were all mine—
Those wrinkles and lines, reading a Wrinkle in Time
Art is from the heart, you said, bled so our eyes can see
Poems at the park, keys of ebony and ivory
Art is from the heart—bled so my eyes can see
This dear diary, my LeeLee is still alive in me.
~Round II Predictions~
Tyson vs. Razah
I can only be honest here. I would favor Razah with out a penalty in his favor and now he potentially gets a three vote cushion right off the bat. It's going to be a very steep hill Tyson must trudge through in order to get the W. I know he can write a solid verse, but also know he isn't at that elite level yet. He has the potential to pen one of his best works and win, but I don't think it's likely. Razah will no doubt write his usual heavy rhymed short verse that cuts straight to the chase. So Tyson will need to write a full length verse and not have any real typos or errors in order to pull out a huge upset.
Razah 80%
Frank vs. Vividlyvague
Intriguing battle here. I think it can go either way, and if it weren't for a deep push on vivid's side in the AOWL playoffs I would be inclined to call this much closer. I do think Frank is the better writer, but I know Vivid is more consistent. However Franks best is better than Vivid's all day. Frank will likely write a story that will push the line limit. Vivid will just need to actually sit down, focus and actually write something to pull out the win. A lot to ask for just removed from a vigourous season/post season. I wouldn't call it an upset if Vivid wins because this really could go either way. Still, Frank deserves to be favored.
Frankie 57%
Argh vs. Mr. J
As much as I want to say this match up is great stylistically, I just don't see it. Both of these writers are extremely skilled and are each respectively, quite possibly, the two most consistent out of the field. The problem is, one seems dead set on quick writing in brevity while the other writes with extreme polish with a full body ;) of busty lyricism that makes the most mascuine of men salivate due to the sheer beauty posses. She writes ok too ;). Mr. J will need something more polished to edge this one out, and that's just not him.
Argh 70%
NYCSPITZ vs. Diode
This will not be a friendly match. I don't think these two particularly like each other and they've made it known. I think I have only ever read like 4 of Diodes verses so I'm not the most qualified to predict this, he's a realitive unkown for me, but I know people seem to vote for him a lot so he must be decent and highly readable. NYC is a monster though. One of my favorites all time, though in the past year he's dropped multiple spots easily. He can destroy the best when they are at there best, but what I do know about Diode is that when the topic is right for him, he can beat you with a concept alone. I'm thinking along the lines of that R-Kelly verse whiles back. So this is a true toss up, but I think the favorite has to be...
NYCSPITZ 55%
Dead man vs. Pie
Dope battle here. This prediction is going to seem weird on the surface, but keep in mind that Deadman has a 3 vote handy cap he's dealing with. Pie is a talented writer. He penned some really good verses season one, dispatching some high level challengers. He's pretty polished, though that was a long time ago so it's more a shot in the dark this prediction. But dead man is dead man. He's not likely going to write, I mean actually sit down and write a full length verse. He's nearly guranteed to post the day of the due date in a twenty line key with pure athleticism if you will. He's not the hardest working writer, but he's one of the best on any site. A natural talent who has a penchant for writing verses that resonate with any voter. With that said, the 3 vote swing is key.
Pie 51%
GodComplex vs. Pent uP
Fire match right here. I'm excited to see if GC can produce his higher level works rather then his relatively quicker works. I think Pent is the superior writer, but he has faltered from time to time just missing conceptually. I think that can be attributed to his massive catalog of verses and him just doing something different then has previously. GC on the other hand, he's not a one trick pony despite what some may think. Last season of the AOWL he wrote some stellar stories, which I originally thought would be out of his comfort zone. He seems to have evolved at the right time. I know he's still likely fatigued, and that will play a huge factor in my prediction. But anyone who thinks this battle is less then potential BOTW is nuts. I expect a very long read on each side. Pent will need to beat GC conceptually because I don't think a man, or BE can beat him depth wise. Dude can pack in a humongous amount of reference which I for one love, its just more meat on the bone, but some may see it as taxing. This is a toss up.
Pent uP 58%
Witty vs. Cimmerian
Holly fuck at this battle. I think this will be the most entertaining of all and probably the fastest read of the round. I also think these are two evenly matched writers. Cimm seems to have a very clean style, both rhyme and concept wise. Meanwhile Witty is just a beast. His rhymes are as fluid as you will find on the net, his concepts are hit or miss, but far more hits then misses. Witty really is his own enemy at this point. Probably would be a favorite in any battle if had any sense of motivation what so ever HAHA, I keed, sort of. If Witty can produce a full length verse with minimal mistakes and solid concept, he should be able to squeak out a tight win against a 20 line topical with concept most would not be able to think of. It really will all come down to polish on Witty's end.
Cimmerian 55%
Pinot Grij vs. Soulstice
This is going to be a monster to vote on. I think this is as even a match as any ever. Pinot has a knack for producing off the wall concepts while Soulstice is just a writers writer. I think Pinot will garner the the vote for entertainment, but he's known for falling flat if the concept is a dud. Meanwhile Soul will get the seasoned poets vote because he's a pure writer, but he can be wordy at times, not only that, but he too can be his own worst enemy. He can think to deep or vague while writing essentially over shooting his peers, leaving them to formulate there own interpretation which can be bad for some of the readers. In the end, this is my BOTW vote and I look forward to it the most.
Pinot Grij 51%