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Old 11-21-2015, 05:22 AM   #8
timeless
past tense
 
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Asylum, wasn't feeling this tbh. Lots of good, quotable lines but there was just so much filler in your story that made it difficult to enjoy it. Even after a second read it was just idk lol. I was expecting a lot more at the end. Not your best piece here.

Pat, always enjoy your pieces. They're so refreshing to read most of the time. Your style just doesn't seem as stock as 90% of topical writers. Seemed like you rushed the fuck out of this one though with no clear direction. That's not to say it wasn't enjoyable but I've seen alot better work from you

Tough choice again.

V. Asylum for a more rounded/complete read.
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