mmlp- the final idea of this piece was awesome, but some for the end rhymes were off throughout. The descriptions were also not as concrete to me as they could have been to make the imagery more stable and vivid, even if it was meant to mislead. Overall, I thought this piece was cool. Good Job.
ydk- I enjoyed this metaphor angle. The language was natural and rhymed solidly, plus I liked ythe lighht introspection, as it wasn't too dramatic. This was way far into your confort zone, but the changhe of pace for me readiung yuou is that I felt positively affected by the final thought. The bonus was also that this is very relatable for me. Overall, good job bro.
After thinking about what I've read, it came down to enjoyability and, and overall execution for me. I think one piece resonates more with me here. MVGT YDK
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