He looks like he writes diary entries from the perspective of a radioactive mushroom.
He looks like he rubs sushi on his armpits and worships a statue of Arthur C. Clarke.
He looks like a janitor from Gattaca got seduced by a turnip from the Love Machine.
He looks like a Sims custom character: Gary Snuggleshoes III.
He looks like the mascot for Charmin Ultra-absorbent Football Helmets.
He looks like he owns a hydrophonics music studio.
He looks like he jumped off a mothership and ended up in the fatherhood. He is the daddy to three Coneheads and Crash Bandicoot.
He looks like a troll that personifies AOL Mail customer service.
He looks like a Legomania enthusiast.
He looks like he can palm a trash can lid but when he does, he shits golden bricks and pees Andrea Bocelli's tears.
He looks like a diamond in the ruff if the diamond was a degenerate East-European trash bag.
He looks like he cauterizes bad relationships.
He looks like a feminized repoman from the Czech Republic got a cell phone distribution deal.
He looks like a koala bear trainer who names everything "Claustrofreude!"
He looks like his jaw is made out of jumbo shrimp.
He looks like he can craft skull fragment sentences.
He has a Cheerios bracelet collection yet claims his loyalty lies with the Cheetos panther.
He looks like Ruben from American Idol covered in custard, Tapout energy drinks, and stale cigarette juice.
He looks like a customer service agent at the Reno911 Parody Call Center.
He looks like a bad dream's bad dream.
He looks like the solution to an argument about torpedo guns as an agricultural tool.
He looks like a Definitive Jux reject started a fan club for Stanley Kubrick's zucchini.
He looks like his alarm clock has the words 'Lesbian Garrison Troops' on it.
He looks like he has a pet marmaduke.
He looks like Jimmy Ambriz melded with the gay mobster from Cowboy Bebop.
Last edited by Vulgar; 11-03-2015 at 12:56 AM.
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