This was pretty cool, I didnt like that opening though
the rest of it seemed to work really well for you, I just felt opening your story that way
and ending it how you did kind of just threw me off towards the end of the verse
regardless I felt like that you had a pretty good rhyme scheme, the flow was cool
I really enjoyed how you brought this all together and made an interesting dystopian piece
didnt really enjoy the end as much as I thought I would, I mean its cool
but I didnt get caught up in this piece like I would your others.
dope work though
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