Mmlp, I appreciate your improvement since I first seen you drop pieces on here. Although I must say that this verse seems rushed, and could've been way more entertaining if you had fleshed it out more. Too many sudden/out of nowhere lines that distracted me from the humor you attempted to input. Your flow and rhymes have gotten light years better, you just need to flesh out your content more and you'll be competing with the best in no time. Keep writing my dude.
Bigelow, the first 8 or so lines were dope. Flowed real smooth and its just like you lost all motivation to finish this piece like the way it could've been. Your tie-in to the topic was mediocre at best, with no real sense of direction. You're writing is polished in general when it comes to flow and schemes, which tells me this isn't new for you and you have rust to rid of.
Bobby had the more polished writing, but I'll take mmlps complete approach over a short nothing anyday.
V. Mmlp
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