Nigma, this was alright. I feel like it's difficult for me to relate to your style sometimes. Your stories aren't really precise. It's like there's a start and an end but the middle is just a bunch of different punchlines and concepts. Technically, it's good, but conceptually I'm not much of a fan. Your wording is smooth which helps the read keep it's fluidity. Your rhyme scheme is solid which also helps the flow of things. I just can't get into the story itself because you're all over the place. Sorry man.
Mr. J, I liked this. Reminded me a lot of a collaboration piece I wrote back in like 2007 about a clown that kills himself on the tight rope because he's sick of entertaining others who just want to see him get hurt or embarrassed. I understand this isn't about a clown, but for some reason that piece came to mind. Technically, this was nice. Your wording was clean and you had a few creatives lines here and there, especially towards the middle and end. Flow was fluent the entire time. I also enjoyed the concept, wasn't incredibly new but it was something that kept interest nonetheless.
This is a close battle but I feel like I enjoyed Mr. J's story tell more. So. Vote Mr. J.
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