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Old 09-10-2015, 03:55 AM   #6
Half Wit It
Nalyubuites
 
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Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 449
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Half Wit It has a brilliant futureHalf Wit It has a brilliant futureHalf Wit It has a brilliant futureHalf Wit It has a brilliant futureHalf Wit It has a brilliant futureHalf Wit It has a brilliant futureHalf Wit It has a brilliant futureHalf Wit It has a brilliant futureHalf Wit It has a brilliant futureHalf Wit It has a brilliant futureHalf Wit It has a brilliant future
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Quote:
Patience first.
Stay alert.
When the end is in sight and your adrenaline heightens,
the pressure is frightening.
You'll feel it in your chest as it tightens.
But only those who can keep their head in a crisis are destined to triumph.
When you sense that the timing is right to make it to home,
savour your goal.
Take in the moment.
The game isn't over,
your seasons just started.
With the experience garnered you can swing for those bleachers regardless.
This section was the dopest to me. Overall though, I'm not going to lie to you bro, this wasn't the best work I've read from you by far. Seemed way too simple and easy to grasp, not saying that's always a bad thing, but in this case the whole storyline just came off as very fairly tale-ish imo. I couldn't really dig it because it didn't really have a soul. Just seemed like something you wrote with no real incentive or passion behind. The lines I quoted stood out but other than that every thing was very basic both in terms of delivery and vocab. Stay up.
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