[Chill Phil]

She's 37, thick as fuck....as pure and white as the undriven snow.



We're talking on the phone for the second time within, 24 hours. I'm making her laugh and shit. She's snorting and laughing at shit that isn't even funny.

Things get quiet for a second.

She's like "God, I really like you."

I'm like "well, we do get along like naps and scalps."

She laughs and utters a sentence that immediately makes her hideous.


She's like "I know I could love you."

I'm like...


"Well, my burrito is done," and I promptly hang up.


Wtf man, I'm lovable but damn, give me a month.




Hope you faggots had a great weekend. I've been drunk since Friday.