Crystal clear skies,
her whistle disappeared with wishful signs.
Blissful tears from crippled eyes,
pistol fears from events in the night.
Working class hero,
burning the past, learning that any hope
squirming in glass, once carried to a burial
- hurried to ask for a miracle.
i liked this opener here
Below shooting stars,
pushing cars instead of pulling Mars.
Curing scars -
luring the dark into worried hearts.
A cashier in daylight,
the stepping stool who isn't paid right.
Pressing through his own grave sight,
left with rules he'd rather escape by.
Pushed to the edge,
bullshit led to a culprit guess.
Pulled from his head,
full of hatred and shunned from death.
Ten minutes to closing,
his image was lifted from coping.
He sits in the crimson - hoping,
listen to the mission and go free.
"Get down on the ground, NOW!"
He pulls out the weapon of choice,
"put all the money in this pouch!"
not a soul makes a noise.
these last few lines were the most enjoyable to me
He knows he'll break,
but then tastes blood.
His bones begin to ache,
- he's been shot in the gut.
We cannot do everything at once,
but can do something at once.
When patience turns into a burden,
we lose sight of what we've become.
Dead, idk man... this was kinda bland and simple.. no real story and just kind of a whole hoe hum feel to it. now i could be reaching but as far as the line that buddah is referring too (pulling stars) the way i interpureted that was being poor and not being able to pay for gas so your pushing your car instead of reaching for the stars lol.. like i said though i could be reaching, i just like to find hidden meanings, even if they were not intended
Work work work...
to fill the hole in your jeans.
Hold your esteem so no one sees and dont be displeased
- you only got the job because of the hole in your genes.
the hole in your jeans/genes was slick rick mah dude
Its cold in my dreams.
So cold that it feels like hope when I breathe
getting burned in every burst as it floats into steam.
Every Three-sixty leaves me crispy -
over-rotisseried.
I'm burnt out, on my third round - I blurt loud in soliloquy
scolding the people that don't know what protocol means.
I love the word sililoquy :)
Toe-to-toe, blow for blow fiends waving their motion to leave
while rowing their shoulders against the undertow of the stream.
Repulsively eat - and fill the hole that you feed.
Hunger and thirst will lessen the first impressions
of the goals that you meet.
Money Money Money
you can pay the toll in your sleep.
Shedding weight is second rate if you're going for keeps.
We're programmable animals who's egos will deplete
if control isn't seized by force of our greed the moment we need.
I didnt like the word will before deplete, made it kind of sticky when reading it
Photos in heaps - ageless with our friends in a sanctum of events.
Too broke to thrive with no overdrive - laying in our beds.
We're crazy in our heads with all our imagery and shapes:
An awfully glossy coffee table mache'd from the filthiest mistakes
for you to kick your feet off the road of bills that you have paid.
There's Routine - in blue jeans and a beer belly - sitting in constraints -
Whiskey and an eighth hanging by a noose and giving him the aches.
Watching wasted obligations that the television illustrates.
A shadow in vast throes of past hopes as a figure in the drapes -
Robbers breaking in with blades of guilt to pick apart the brain -
I felt a vicious repetitious set of wishes quickening the pace.
The keyhole seems close to the spot where our conviction drifts away.
Room lit through a lamp cover that was a prism of decay -
A glimmer in the day from the M.I.B.-like omission of our faith,
A light switch manipulating personalities that're critically acclaimed,
..and a cat - paw deep in the aquarium - simply fishing for escape.
Whirring, whizzing, pissing, sitting, moaning, dizzy
and replay.
We're calm and considerate as long as our interests are maintained -
We'd run our feet to the bone chasing more than one of your thoughts
so
“We cannot do [everything] , but we can do something at once.”
the whole rest of this was dope
ok definitely enjoyed this mah dude, your pieces read off and flow off the toungue pretty effortlessly, as far as content i loved what you did with the word flips and what not, scheme was dope. just a very enjoyable read. props
mvgt=Poh
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