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Old 07-13-2015, 10:32 AM   #12
Vulgar
Razor-thin derision
 
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Join Date: Jan 2013
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Battle Record: 40-25

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Razah - The element of 'preachiness' that this possessed, as you may or may not agree with, actually helped your cause. The voice was "for" the idea that history replaces a 'revolutionary' classification due to your reasons listed. The 'evolve' as a part of 'revolve' part was okay. The rest seemed quickly written, as if every two lines could've been a stanza, but you chose to group them together. As a coherent statement, it worked. I don't know if there was any significant machinery of ideas behind it though since the examples were so thinly provided.

Buddha - I liked the first half more than the second half, easily. You introduced the reader to a world where there is this industrial transformation and the effects are negative, harkening back to the days of cotton field slaves, only this time the cogs in the machine are literal, as the Earth has become a mechanized place. A little bit cliché in terms of the approach, I could see the ending coming. The language used throughout was to the point and uniform, geared towards a specific theme of egalitarianism and environmentalism, with a tone of resignation. Overall, I thought it was okay.

Vote - UnbornBuddha

I thought he came a little more solid. More foundation, which gave me a reason to vote for him.
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