Thread: thankful
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Old 07-08-2015, 10:22 PM   #4
Mr. J
The Clown Prince
 
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because I keep snoozing in a circus. Circling
surplus sleepwalkers move without a purpose;
I’m worthless.
Or Earth’s best when she nurtures (my nurse left).
My words shift
spent chemic blood to remind my words’ intent.
In a sense I’m indigent;
I need my Self to reinvest in the idea of me.
I need rhyming to knot my livelier conceits.
I need lines that I jot to provide a concrete
I can flatten my face against.



This whole section right here was my fave out of all of this...
really well written, the lines are just long enough to make you want more
I enjoyed the intro and ending as well, but this was the icing for me
just enough to keep you wanting more, & enough to keep you fed
some really nice work man, keep writing
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