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Old 06-20-2015, 06:10 AM   #3
Clutbuck
Battle Rap's Married Man
 
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Join Date: May 2015
Location: Crumpetville, England
Posts: 389
Battle Record: 2-0


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something and @Zombie need to collab lol

This was smooth as hell, nice internal rhyme too, second line deserved quoting though:

I filled her ear with ills and fears. All the sorrow I've endured.
Felt like a million bucks when I left. Tomorrow I'll be cured.

The second half turned pretty dark but I liked that more. Almost the Jekyll to the first halfs Hyde and the contrast made it all the more striking. Wish you had carried this on because you seemed to just be hitting the richest vein of form at the end there in the last six or so lines. Nice work.

Keep that pen moving!

#FREEBWAHAHA
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