dead man - I interpreted this as a young man coping with premonitions of death, sneaking up on him like tendrils of sleep. To remind himself that he's alive, he consumes tasty food and blames his fear of death and the unknown on insomniac tendencies. The main character may have a certain way he feels about sleep paralysis, comparing it to the clutch of the netherworld, causing him to reminisce about his grandfather, maybe even getting paid a visit from him while his eyes are closed. As with someone who is panicking or having a hard time coping with reality, this character succumbs to the pressure of is involvement with surreal circumstances, his inner dialogue with the reader displaying his reluctance to pass over to the next world. Since you mentioned needles early in the verse, this could be an allusion to the effects of a heroin overdose that takes a user's life. The use of the word 'fade' was important for the verse because it helped fortify the image of a ghostly presence, a human slowly eroding into a fraction of a spirit, an apt apparition of who he once was. It rhymed well, a versatile showing of schemes which worked.
NYCSPITZ - The idea itself was dope. The peculiar way that the devilish overlord recruits new demons, beckoning the world's finest in combat to the heart of his dark realm, testing their skill, and then executing their damsels like clockwork. An unconventional way of signing your soul to the devil, by consigning yourself to such absolute hatred that it permeates the laws of the universe, heaven and hell, and you find yourself being manipulated into eternal servitude for evil purposes. Writing wise, I've seen much better from you. I think you write action scenes much faster than you write your typical storytelling verses, which are more thought out and thorough, in my opinion. There were moments where you repeated words a lot, for example, the word 'writhe' appeared multiple times in this verse, to a point where I mentally noted its repetitious usage. The concept was cool, it was a pretty entertaining movie unfolding, but the writing wasn't as sharp as per usual.
My vote goes to dead man.
I found his text more interesting and he opened up my mind's portal more than NYC's.
Good battle bruh's
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