[big baby]

written well, but written ...not dynamically. Portions of your writing make way for the following couplet to flourish through design. Sometimes, I'd make my own writing of your version in my head, and I wished you took these routes. What, I mean by this, is not that your writing isn't written well now, but...that I felt you could have really CAPTURED something undeniably difficult to capture, rather than to speak almost tilted towards the topic. It was more of a story, rather than a moment in time captured explicitly. That's ok though, because it was very good either way. Just wish, that you proactively denied any subtle inconvenient thought caused by vague wording. Wish you nailed it on the head and connected decidely with the reader instead of enamoring me with a few lines then letting go, a few lines later. But, I get the context of it all.

lines like "glasses clink" are just this beautiful scenery type places that just excavate a deeper meaning.

Good, man.