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Old 04-16-2013, 11:03 PM   #13
Split
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Join Date: Aug 2013
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zygote.

enjoyed this verse a LOT. awesome allegory. really supported your idea well. mechanics were very nice.

Quote:
Tradition and wisdom stand stronger than your hazardous form,
You are proud, you are faithless, and your kind is a cancerous swarm,
Infecting and spreading until beliefs are eroded and values are gone.
Barely one season old and you are already claiming the right to stay,
You are nothing, I have seen empires rise and fall like night and day.
In short time you will not exist, all your glory will be stripped away,
Swift advancement is always followed by a swift decay.
wow. effective writing all around.

MW.

good verse.
Quote:
life has ups, downs, all arounds and a thousand loops/
we can make it, more than basic, no profound excuse,
so im thankful things are tranquil, like the sound of flutes/
now were winning, the beginning, can be found in roots,
the seeds that we planted, have grown into a surrounding group/
that was great... really captured a nice tone w/ your piece.

your belief in love stands strong against your belief in God, which is how I see this supporting Atheism. the part about heaven being here on earth kinda felt redundant and tacked on, given that. still a nice verse.

awesome match. gotta go to Zygote for an epic verse that really ran away with his topic, imo.
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