Netcees - View Single Post - WK8: CopyPat (5-2) vs. Arid (0-0) [CopyPat wins, 8-0.]

Pent uP · 12-02-2014, 01:14 AM

Arid -- I liked the base of this, but it lacked focus. The scatter brained approach is hard to endure when it feels like youre letting the rhyme lead you instead of the message. Its easy to argue that because the pic said 'underground' the subtext was 'lyricism' but I think the truth is far between. The opening bit about lemmings and caverns I could see being tied to the pic and got quite excited to see where it went but the end result fell shy of expectations. Knock that rust off.

Copy -- in week 2 when I no showed I was kicking myself because I knew that one of twp things would happen: 1) your style would lose its allure, or 2) youd run out of steam. It seems that you the latter is occuring, unless youre just uninspired. Comical take on the pic but poor execution

Vote copy

12-02-2014, 01:14 AM	#11
Pent uP Robin Williams of Fallen Victims Join Date: Feb 2013 Posts: 1,499 Battle Record: 25-11 Accomplishments - NC Hall of Fame Champed - Netcees Writers League (2x) - NWL Season 1 - Write Night I - Art of Writing League (2x) - Write Week IV Rep Power: 6862275	Arid -- I liked the base of this, but it lacked focus. The scatter brained approach is hard to endure when it feels like youre letting the rhyme lead you instead of the message. Its easy to argue that because the pic said 'underground' the subtext was 'lyricism' but I think the truth is far between. The opening bit about lemmings and caverns I could see being tied to the pic and got quite excited to see where it went but the end result fell shy of expectations. Knock that rust off. Copy -- in week 2 when I no showed I was kicking myself because I knew that one of twp things would happen: 1) your style would lose its allure, or 2) youd run out of steam. It seems that you the latter is occuring, unless youre just uninspired. Comical take on the pic but poor execution Vote copy Last edited by Pent uP; 12-02-2014 at 01:16 AM.