Netcees - View Single Post - Alvin Karpis 1-0 vs Knucklehead 1-0

StarFaggot · 11-26-2014, 04:30 PM

Fire battle.

Karpis

1 - nice line, good personal
2 - a bit vague of a reference but this is not bad
3 - nice hit. Could've been simpler though the THOT/thought didn't have to be worked in. Still a mean line.
4 - Jew Fros was a decent light jab
5 - Jew see fruits good np but concept was average.
6 - this was lazy
7 - Chickpea line was chuckles
8 - nice delivery, should've said a vid from Kar but that's being picky

Overall nice verse, no huge missed but some avg lines.

Knucklehead

1 - decent
2 - ale house is decent
3 - that's 3 Indian jokes in a row, this one did not hit.
4 - this needed a different setup or a different punchline bc it doesn't match.
5 - shake it off nice delivery, chuckles
6 - karp'll tunnel is a bit played but I liked the finish
7 - blink of an eye is lotb
8 - as a whole this was ok

Overall nice verse, some of the concepts weren't executed to my liking.

I've got Kar winning this based on better execution of avg lines.

11-26-2014, 04:30 PM	#10
StarFaggot Leave you flatlined. Join Date: Feb 2013 Posts: 5,108 Battle Record: 12-9 Champed - Site Diss 2013 - Tag Team Tournament III Rep Power: 0	Fire battle. Karpis 1 - nice line, good personal 2 - a bit vague of a reference but this is not bad 3 - nice hit. Could've been simpler though the THOT/thought didn't have to be worked in. Still a mean line. 4 - Jew Fros was a decent light jab 5 - Jew see fruits good np but concept was average. 6 - this was lazy 7 - Chickpea line was chuckles 8 - nice delivery, should've said a vid from Kar but that's being picky Overall nice verse, no huge missed but some avg lines. Knucklehead 1 - decent 2 - ale house is decent 3 - that's 3 Indian jokes in a row, this one did not hit. 4 - this needed a different setup or a different punchline bc it doesn't match. 5 - shake it off nice delivery, chuckles 6 - karp'll tunnel is a bit played but I liked the finish 7 - blink of an eye is lotb 8 - as a whole this was ok Overall nice verse, some of the concepts weren't executed to my liking. I've got Kar winning this based on better execution of avg lines. __________________ [B][CENTER][SIZE="5"] It's Aero join me at RAPBATTLES[/SIZE][/CENTER][/B]