TopicalDood5- the scheme, story, word choices, and progression.. are all very good here. i can't really criticize anything at all. really enjoyed the rhymes of the second stanza.. also hostile quiet/impossible triumph killed it.
the way you broke it down and told your tale is admirable, to say the least. excellent piece.
ZenLand- whoa? lol. kinda blew me out of the water with the twist. it looks like you pumped this out really quick - a couple other people said that. i can't interpret what they meant by that, but i'm saying it as a compliment.
it looks as if you produced this powerful tale effortlessly. and that to me, is the hallmark of an excellent writer.
/v Top - the difference between the two pieces that made my decision was the rhyme scheme's. combined with the excellent layout/story progression, top really killed it this week. good stuff from both, in their own styles.
good match.
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