View Single Post
Old 11-09-2014, 09:46 PM   #8
King Ra.
The Throne, The Crown
 
King Ra.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 2,667
Battle Record: 21-35



Rep Power: 1932963
King Ra. has a brilliant futureKing Ra. has a brilliant futureKing Ra. has a brilliant futureKing Ra. has a brilliant futureKing Ra. has a brilliant futureKing Ra. has a brilliant futureKing Ra. has a brilliant futureKing Ra. has a brilliant futureKing Ra. has a brilliant futureKing Ra. has a brilliant futureKing Ra. has a brilliant future
Default

dead man, what makes your verse stand out, is the connections from line to line that transitions so smoothly, as you tied together delicate phrases that draws an image of a person who is buried alive. I like the sort of direct take on the topic & your concept was good. timeless, while you had some good phrases, I didn't really get much from your story. Whereas your opponent had a clear take on the topic, I couldn't really tie too much together from what was presented. The opening lines were awkward; mainly because what came after felt detached. Nonetheless, it was an interesting read, but dead man wrote just as well, while having a better overall concept. MVGT: dead man. Good job by both competitors.
__________________
Vetwork, bitches.
King Ra. is offline