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Old 11-08-2014, 02:16 PM   #5
Mr. J
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Both of you went over the line limit, which is NOT what I want to read the first time
regardless here I am looking through the pieces...

kannon, I feel like this topic really suits you due to your verse
you capture the idea pretty well and keep on rolling through smoothly
I feel like if not for the extension in lines you might have missed your mark
the ending of the verse serves as a added ingredient to the closure
you as I said at the beginning, shine through and show some dedication
nice work my dude...

greed, same goes for you, the topic suits you as well
you started off with a bang and ended up easing off half way through
at least I feel that you did...I thought you did at least
but eventually you picked back up and made the effort show in the end
....keep it up

v/I feel like the topic was an easily adaptable verse
and feel that both competitors were evenly matched
the extension of lines didn't need to happen and it saddened me...
angered me actually...either way you both showed some passion
and made me read til' the end regardless...
the writer who shined the most was....kannon...nice work my dude
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