[Adonis]

Buddha - Rhyme Scheme is easy and not the most captivating...."Futures Direly, survival needs unlocks the the final key"... I'm saying though, this syllable pattern is hardly dedicated and true, it's more lucky cluster then skill...Yadimean?. "All the dwellers of this planet all resembled crazy scary liberals" All and all in same sentence take away. then...."Drafting political treatises with policies drenched in airy fairy miracles" you displaced the rhyme scheme, essentially going slant rhyme, you do this a plenty, I'm not a fan. "Zeus, the lord all the greek tragedies didn't send me to die" not even a proper sentence. "Decline,sign, science, sign". Not the greatest of end rhymes or flow to be blunt. I appologize for being raw, but I only have few minutes to vote. This is who i am. A tale of the moon, her struggles and accomplishments. I liked the verse for what it was, although I disliked the begining 3/4's or so. You then began a solid verse with, "this is for the remedial", I enjoyed this more crisp and to the point style over the stretched and hidden meaning of before. I give this a 26/50

Kan - Good schemes, horribly under-devoloped. The end concept was not ellaborated upon, the verse fell a bit short because of this. I feel like you focused on rhyme above all. Fine, but you ended with a solid concept, but the ending was not explained throughout the verse, it simply ended there. I enjoyed the read, but feel like you missed a huge opportunity in note going back and updating the verse after you wrote it, and before you pushed send.


This is a close match, Kan had the better verse, but I really did enjoy the final stanza from Buddha. He matched, nay, beat his opponents scheme all while tying his cinceot a nice bow. While kan had structure but failed to tie the bow.


V/ Buddha