ah defiant i didn't really get what u were trying to do with ur verse here. technically it was real basic and just left me not real impressed. dove- u had a clear idea of where this was going and it was a cool little verse. u told us it was about computers/technology etc but didnt blurt it out right at the start. u dropped hints all along and then solidified it at the end so the way this was written was well done. on the rhyming end dove out-shined defiant pretty handily but Dove u will need to do more in the future. u have a good idea of flow and multis and scheming and inner bar rhyming etc but i've always felt ur vocab is just real basic. or like the actual rhymes u choose are too easy like magic havoc captured . lame similes like hot as satan, then rhyming it with location? know what i mean?? i just think u r capable of so much more. like u could really add a lot more complexity to ur writing and it would be sick. in this case it was enough but yeah going forward against better comp a verse like this would get stomped i think. i did like ur concept though and u stuck to the topic.
VOTE: DOUBLE D DUB DIZZY
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My syllable count approximately a billion, bounce. You cannot compete.
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