[Certain]

theMuzzl3: This battle has no votes because your verse is so ridiculously long. Before you try something this ambitious, it might be a better idea to work on smaller scales in figuring out the mechanics required in this genre. That's your biggest weakness by far here: You simply don't have the mechanics required down. Your rhymes are weak, sparse and overly slanted. Start rhyming multiple syllables at once (e.g. heavy hand/levee stands) and using a more standard meter (12 to 15 syllables usually will set up a decent cadence). Once you've got that down pat, you can start experimenting more. But this verse did not flow at all. Still, the content was good. Even some of the metaphors were strong, and you told your story with a degree of objectivity. I'm not big on autobiographical content, but you have a very earnest, though drawn-out and sloppy, voice here. Figuring out how to bring that to original and creative content rather than such an easy personal starting point, while also adding in proper rhyme mechanics, will be the key. But I really do think you could end up being good in time.

Mr. J: At first, I thought this verse would be about Ebola. I think I would have liked that version more. This wasn't all that interesting, despite some solid lyricism. The concept worked with the topic well enough but also showed the lack of inspiration bemoaned in the preamble. (Aside: That's the type of thing that some voters will judge you negatively for, unfortunately.) The devil is just a trite concept. To be honest, you let theMuzzl3 make this way closer than it logically should, as his verse was more engaging from a content perspective. But it's hard to overlook your craftsmanship compared to his.

Vote: Mr. J