[King Ra.]

OPEN MIC FEATURE #2

"Paint You Renaissance"
written by dead man

enter the

ever addicted. albuterol and methyl prescription
breathless as liquid, lung cysts, cigarettes at the clinic
typing text for a minute, dead heat like anti-semetic deliverance
most flow congestive heartache at the special olympics
it's expected, a gimmick. to write on essence of spirit
or rhythmic dissertations. theoretical physics
once you've tested the limit - horizons loop, it's instrumental to listen
for snare traps on random samples like a measured statistic
catch it for miss it. it was written, while mr. jones counted crows in the sky
blue ribbons, silver bullets, wolves, emotional ties
sober or high, two-track parallel for social or shy
i've hoped for a lie, discovered hatefulness and chosen a side
quoth the decline, stocks and snowflakes, both are designed
PM Motrin to wine about their voting online. Merlot when we dine
knowably grind your favorite bitch, codeine slow motion her spine
moisture soaking her thighs
the kind only cocoa butter lotion provides
wrap a noose around your neck, drop the rope as you die
spit blood upon your grave before i choke you alive
interpret each occurrence as a token or sign,
regrets are scar tissue. fleshy phantoms, ghosts of your pride
i'm supposed to reside in Transylvania, or Rome in the time
of renaissance children painting poems that rhymed
hopelessly blind, third eye remains too focused to mind
open wide, fuck your choice. what does Sophie decide?


DONT LOOK SEE

Week 5: No Show Love: Back in the Past
Produced By: Adonis



Tyson – Wrote a story of a Bookie/ Gambler, who was the best at what he does. But gravity is constant, and the Gambler eventually came back to earth; losing everything.

Originally Posted by TYSON

Too many get the picture but seem to crop it off often
When dealing with the bosses u are expendable they will only pay for your coffin
Now I travel from state to state with no place to stay
Cause my umbrella crumbled before my eyes with great decay

It was a short, too the point and easy to follow verse. One thing I didn't like much was you made the star a bookie in the beginning, making his boss money, but then said place bets with me and you'll never lose money. These contradict as either he's a gambler, betting and is good at it, or a bookie setting good enough lines that the “boss” always comes out on top. Either way, he can't make the boss and betters happy, but you made it so. All in all a very quick read that had good flow nearly throughout the entire verse. Good drop.


VINZR – Wrote of two characters in two different phases of life, who meet sparks fly. The topic was executed well, the flow was really good. To me it read as vulnerable, somber and moved along briskly. Both characters had enough build up to draw a connection to each, then there was a decent amount of imagery sprinkled here and there that simply helped a good story line shine to something more.

Originally Posted by VINZR

The road that Katy walked led her straight to the Church’s door
Something about this place just helped her climb her inner walls
All the fear she ever saw, crept back into the darkness*
She flicked on the switch inside her and used the light as a harness

Some good writing in metaphor form here, this was definitely the highlight of the verse to me. One bit of criticism is the simplicity in choice of rhyming, i.e. “pool/stool, beverage/leverage”. Not many inners or Multies were found, and it reads as if you write the first thing that comes to mind rhyme wise. You have talent with writing, but as a reader occasionally spicing up a scheme or such goes a long way. Great read though.



C.D.M. – This was a very impressive showing. From flow to story-line, to any other criteria of voting you might have. CDM wrote a tale of twin brothers, polar opposites in all fashions on life. One smart, loved more and a missionary. The other weak and military. The story culliminates with them meeting for the first time in some 15 years...

Originally Posted by c.d.m.

James laid waste to everything that moved, armed or other wise
His rifle’s rapport was like Zeus lighting up with thunder skies

His team killed the warlord, and as they were leaving they saw a man crying
James put a bullet in the man’s back, now he and his team saw a man dying

They dying man called out: “JAMES…..” with all the strength he could muster
James saw the face of John, and panic started to race….. could it be his long lost brother?

John remembered his dream, and while James wept, John knew it would be fine
His last words were: “Brother, I love you…..remember Matthew 5:9”

The story struck the topic dead on, had a particular flow to it that let the words breathe with ease. The imagery was vivid and the verse all in all was nearly void of flaw. Great read in the end that I'm sure if weren't a no-show verse would have received majority votes with most people oozing of its greatness. Ego fed kind sir, this will be the last.


I did not include the typical 12 line 24 word verses of nothing for no-show love...except this one


INK – I am quoting the entire verse because it's short, and even considering the length I feel like it could have won against a few other complete verses in any week...

Originally Posted by INK

Narrowed eyes, needle sharp, make a claustrophobe nervous
Harrowed mind with a past, outlet a killers gaze with purpose
ECG beeps, a fire, alarm is for those that aren't expecting
This inferno of my soul is one she stoked in my infant, see
She robbed me of revenge, this talk of turning a new leaf
The old one's still in the pile! With alcohol and soiled dreams
Soaked to the bones... NO!
To the cells - behind these bars where you keep me
I'M A PRISONER! Check the black and white stripings
Zebra skin, you're the lioness, we're in the lions den
This situation is a bottle cap, the underside says "try again"
Everybody loves what you've become, last days and all

I “underlined” a great line, absolutely amazing imagery/metaphor that is a sign of a great writer. I know something came up and you couldn't finish the verse, but this was the makings of classic in my opinion. Hope you one day finish it. Great beginning.

[QUOTE=Adonis]

Week 7: No Show Shizine
Produced By: Adonis



Nigma – I'll begin with the bad news I guess, first, are you from the states? The grammar in this was pretty bad bro. I won't point them out but numerous misspelled words, grammatical/ wrong tense or a combination of both I encountered. But when you sit and read the piece for what it is...I'm not positive of the underlying meaning but, a story of a soldier and his comrades. The protagonist is simply a soldier, and the theme is the bond he holds. This verse was laced with an abundance of Multies/ Inners...

Originally Posted by Nigma

We fought to stay together and we called it courage
That's wrongly worded, when clocks are turned that stops.
At first they walked and thrived. Only the strong survive
Friendships fall and die all flawed by the wrong advice
The smallest fights are turning friend to foe like zombie bites

I liked the verse, not in love with it, but it was a solid showing none the less. I will add that some of the Multies almost “took away” as much as highlighted the verse. There were some poor word choices that rhymed superbly, but I assume your main focus here was Rhyme? If so you did that great, good verse.


Objective – Wrote a very short narrative, yet chalk full of ideas. I've never read a thing from you, but I see some talent there, especially with a smorgasbord of ideas style which I think can be difficult for most. The rhyme schemes were not difficult, and based off some of the wording I will go out on a limb and say you are not American??

Originally Posted by Objective

I knew a graffiti artist called Seven Plots,
he dedicated his life to paint heaven spots.
Climbing roofs and sketchy buildings,
colored the world his to grasp its feelings.
He was dead inside but the can awoke his spirit,
until he fell thirteen stories and reached his limit.
He knew the risk but had to live it
and you better believe it;
He wasn't out of place,
Even with a cracked skull you could see a smile on his face.

This exert should pretty much sum up the style in a nutshell. I loved the route you took the topic, you gave the topic life and brought it full circle from beginning to end. All in all a decent verse, simple and short, yet still effective.




A WORD FROM THE KING.... "A Look Into This Weeks Topics"

I received a few questions about how to go about this weeks topics. So for those who don't have any idea, I'm going to explain. Your focus this week is the quote & not the picture. The picture is there as a reference. How you go about writing your piece is entirely up to you. If you want to use the movie as your base, feel free. Don't worry about using the picture. This is a challenging week from what it looks like, but I'm expecting to see some very interesting verses. So do the damn thing. Holler.







THE EIGHTLY SHOW, episode 3


split eight (17:57:13): wanna do that interview?

Darryl King (18:21:01): Sure

split eight (18:21:16): cool cool. so, introduce yourself to people who may not know you in the league

Darryl King (18:26:19): Sup, my name is Witty. I hope we can be friends forever

split eight (18:26:14): foreva eva? foreva eva???

Darryl King (18:27:52): Yes talking owl outkast forever

split eight (18:27:29): lmao. fyi im doing this on the fly, sorry if i take forever

Darryl King (18:28:27): It's all good

split eight (18:27:58): So, what did you think about the champ match last week, Red Glare aka Barakon vs Frank our Furter?

Darryl King (18:34:43): It was a great battle, I'm a fan of both, I like how they write, I think the 12-1 result isn't an accurate reflection of how close it really was imo at least, but I do think the right person won. Red is a future champ though, without doubt

split eight (18:34:54): indeed. too bad he picked such a ballsacky name. any particular matches youre looknig forward to this week?

Darryl King (18:38:28): Champ match should be crazy, pohfig vs barakon should be awesome, yourself and veritas should be awesome too, and also nigma vs adonis, who I think could be the dark horse this season. So many great battles.

split eight (18:38:01): nigma or adonis as dark horse?

Darryl King (18:40:39): Adonis, I think Nigma will also be challenging the championship too though

Darryl King (18:41:28): The amount of awesome writers in this league is insane

split eight (18:40:43): I personally have Nigma as dark horse... dude has had a deceptively tough schedule cause of all the no-shows he's been on the receiving end of. motivation sapper

split eight (18:40:44): and i agree

split eight (18:42:01): so, you have one of the more distinctive styles in the league.. .any major influences, either in actual rap or in text?

Darryl King (18:55:18): Not really tbh I just have always loved writing stories and I have always loved rhyming...so it just makes sense to do both at once

split eight (19:05:07): naturally! how are you feeling about your matchup this week, as well as your position as we get near playoffs?

Darryl King (19:07:09): It is going to be an awesome battle, dude is dope, its gonna be a tough one

Darryl King (19:07:30): I'm confident though

split eight (19:07:48): he has been known to procreate with fruits. that is where he draws his sorcery

split eight (19:07:52): be wary

Darryl King (19:08:21): Lmao I will be

split eight (19:11:09): indubitably. our interview's close grows ever closer... before we enter the final sprint, do you have any comments or suggestions for how hte league is being run?

Darryl King (19:16:29): I want 60 lines!

split eight (19:17:07): the fulfillment of this wish will be reprieved, provided you answer these riddles three...

split eight (19:17:30): 1) Have you ever drank Bailey's from a shoe?

Darryl King (19:21:31): Not since the last time

split eight (19:22:28): 2) what writes but never talks, fights but never walks, and smites but never mocks

Darryl King (19:25:31): Sheep

split eight (19:25:43): ah yes. the rare Northern Irish Smiting topicalbattlesheep

split eight (19:26:08): 3) favorite color

Darryl King (19:29:49): Purple, I love that word too

split eight (19:29:37): royal purple or perwinkle

split eight (19:29:41): PERIWINKLE

Darryl King (19:30:25): Iono :-(

split eight (19:29:57): correct

split eight (19:30:27): okay, closing up with, any shout outs or fuck u's you'd like to throw out?

Darryl King (19:31:21): Shout out to everyone and fuck you to everyone

split eight (19:31:16): Thanks for the interview! pz

Darryl King (19:32:13): Pz!