Probably the weirdest match up of the week. Nice to see Greed on the topical side of things, though, you could certainly use a lot more practice. Muzzle, you story was overly wordy. Rather than focus primarily on your concept, you seemed to just spray the canvas with a bunch of words to make this look like something of an epic (only I can pull that off by the way) but, in reality, you over did things a bit. The length of your lines & the near generic scheme of your piece really hindered this from being really good. I didn't like much from your first stanza but the last two parts were okay. The overall theme of your story wasn't that captivating, but it did have it's moments. Greed, you started off pretty good, but then after those first couple of lines, idk what happened. You probably could have gotten more votes if you managed to put together a more cohesive piece. There just wasn't much to be desired after the first couple of lines. It started reading more like an open mic flex than a topical/story. Hopefully, this was just a warm up.
MVGT: theMuzzl3. Good job by both competitors.
__________________
Vetwork, bitches.
|