I messaged her, “I want to see you soon
We could meet at noon at some greasy spoon
Just me and you, some split pea soup, and let our feelings bloom
It’s easy to see me swoon, there’s nothing you need to do
Cuz I can tell we were meant to be without even meeting you
My online bio will tell you what my interests happen to be
Like how my favourite shows are Battlestar Galactica and Dragonball Z
I hate Macs, love PCs – not rich, but my bitcoin fortune’s huge
Plus I know a guy who knows the guy who leaked the Jennifer Lawrence nudes
I’m a video game fiend, but I’m still a sexual lothario, believe me
I’ll have you sliding down more pipes than Mario and Luigi
Like a first-person shooter, on the sexual Battlefield I’m good to go
Cuz it’s my Call of Duty to Command & Conquer your pussy hole
Oh ya, and I’m a Trekkie… girl, it’s like you can read my mind
So you’ll have to Klingon when we sixty-Deep Space Nine
I’ll rain down my giant loads on you like Sodom & Gomorrah
And do it all without taking off my awesome fedora
No more, then… that’s just a teaser of what’s in store for dat ass
So I’ll just wait here for you, I’m sure only a few moments will pass"
