[big baby]

BB da BB to human translation: About two weeks ago, me, certain and pancake met up. We were in the area and decided, why not? Everybody had free time and we were literally driving distance away from each other.

After everybody agreed, we met up at a bohemian bar. It was weird getting to know each other at first, but when certain made a gay joke everything smoothed out because I think we're all pretty gay.

It got crazy, we started one upping each other, and then we got into a VIP area where certain started telling us stories about something. Then we took shots and got free shots. So by the time we started getting relaxed we were already a bit inebriated. Certain then bragged that he could get the hottest girl at the bars number. We bet him 20 bucks each that he couldn't do it and he took it. He went up to the girl and whispered something in her ear, she laughed and look confused then she took his phone and he put a thumbs up behind his back to assure us that he scored, easily. He came back and literally half a minute later he called her, ....WHILE IN THE BAR. He told her to look up in the VIP section and he waved. His exact words, "these are my friends, pan and baby, you think they're cool?" She said yes, or something. And Certain said, meet us in the VIP bathroom in about a minute or so and she nodded and agreed! Certain went in first, and told us to wait a bit. After awhile we kinda forgot he was in there? So pancake went in and checked....I was outside alone getting motherfucking BODIED. Then after 5 minutes I went in to check. VIP empty except for the lit corner. I go and pancake and certain straight up MOLLYWHOPPING THE FUCK out of this bitch. Straight up like walking in on your parents DOING IT. So then, I said fuck it, and joined. IT was the gayest most surreal bro moment ever. After that we did so many other things and our confidence was at an ALL TIME HIGH. IT was pretty insane and I thought I was dreaming at first but then I woke up and mustachia was yelling at me, so I knew it was real. Anyway, we knew bags lived in the area?

Atleast certain did, because he knows everything and checks IP. And hes talked about it before.

We got into contact with bags. Bags complied and thought we were joking. A day later it was the 4 of us, me, certain, pancake, bags at a fucking lounge midnight. Bags had a burger king watch on. Anyway, after awhile we did some CRAZY ASS BRO SHIT. And after that we hit a few spots and after we went insane with females, outside of a bar a fight broke loose.

Saw bouncers bouncing and shit I WAS LIKE OH SHIT, I look to my side and certain is in his phone looking up some crazy geek journalist data about the 1998 refuge of socialist beanie bags or something idk.

It was BAGS AND PANCAKE, STRAIGHT UP FIGHTING, DUKING IT OUT, BLACKCAKE, BAGGACIO BAGATRON, DUKING IT OUT, HARDCORE.

Pan lifted fucking bags in the air and threw him against the wall clumsily, and bags came back wtih some crazy AHHHHHHHHHH SPARTAAAAAA move and got pancake by his stomach or something. I came and broke it up cause the bouncers weren't doing much. They were mad at each other even through our bro moment.

They still are mad, and I'm here to tell them to apologize to each other.