[Cereal_Killa]

topic:
Man that was a serious epic battle.. Depicted beautifully, gracefully.. from the aligning of troops, to the annitiation of the fight, to the blood soaked ground.. Nice and there stands a wee lil mystic of a man to trick a bunch of meat heads with weapons.. Love it.. Dope your mystic rocked as a character which is my fav part of all the stuff i've read from you.. always you make a sensational character that im like damn it'll be sick to be that character.. Awesome thing to do.. Overall development of the story sweet, butter.. vocab and placement all hot with the structure though simple was swinging.. This was a cool verse mate..

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LOL i just scrolled back up to read INN's verse n i stopped to read it..n its IAMBENT's vote.. i'm like wtf what a massive arse breakdown.. RESPECT..anywhoot back to my vote

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INN:
Your structure was pretty damn cool my friend.. the small font to separate the stanzas, sort of like its hook.. dope.. Hey all in all i think the concept is done but what brought this as it's own was the straight edge reality of WHY your character would do something like this.. Your rhyming was nice man, there was one line where the repetition was unneeded.. "the kid drank to drink.." you didnt need the "so he was never sober" in there but it was only one instance n the rest of this ish banged.. Especially this..

Cocked back he spots and tracks his targets like it’s a sport
Brain splatters over chalk and blackboards as he shows no remorse…

pretty cool opening..

My fav bit to me, n im pretty certain you didnt do it intentially like this but i loved that you did it..

"so he blends in with the chairs and his skin resembles the walls"

Man you had me picturing this kid, squating down on the ground in the middle of the classroom.. pretending he was a chair.. No disrespect wat so eva that mental image will make me smile for days..
N the cool bit about it was, that it didnt even take away from the seriousness of your verse.. cause your emotion through out held that together..
nice one mate.. diggin it :)

vote = topicaldood5

This monsters characters are off da chain.. they are oober cool, and always magical in some way which i love that ish.. nice drop by both, this battle was a seriously solid read.. cheers peeps..