[Split]

John and Alaina's marriage was odd, abnormally candid.
Smoldering. In shambles. The aurora borealis
couldn't hold a candle to the light display that
his wife would make as John made an outing,
knowing he'd be as faithful as the sun
to the embraces of an icy, barren earth.
Everyone knows. I would've married her.
But my friend John seemed as good a match as any-
and knowing her, despite my mattress envy...
thank God I'm not growing colder in a controlled burn.