Quote:
Originally Posted by Split
YDK's verse was comically bad. I dont think YDK is a bad writer in general and hes a nice guy, his writing tends towards simplicity. But without the cushion of 45 lines of plot development YDK takes simplicity down to a 4th grade reading level. I don't have enough bad things to say about this verse
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i think you need to lighten up on the guy. i read a few of his pieces and this seemed to be more helpful towards his style. anyway, to each his own. the problem I think was the hidden factor you had that only revealed in your ending line. everything else built it up, and that was neat but the ending made it seem, commonplace, and just OKAY. mike took a similar approach? but had better diction, it seemed. the homeostasis line separated you, but then you hurdled back with the following line...the ending generality of the topic, leaned towards mike. great read mike and ydk.