this felt a little mechanical to me. I wasnt too into the imagery, for whatever reason.
Quote:
Originally Posted by dead man
watched a man die and put a torch to his carcass
as it burned i felt a bitter sense of mortal catharsis
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this was the highlight for me, like the rest of the verse, it came out of left field but theres sort of an appeal to that disjointed narrative style and it shone through here. Cormac McCarthy ish
very zen
liked the carving a key line too but i wish there was more significance, it felt like untapped potential.
I did enjoy it overall but it felt, dunno, whimsical or carefree. I can dig it though, this was a side of your writing i havent really seen
You stoned brah? :0
cool drop