I believe in telling your wife just about everything. There are certain instances like friends with issues as you said, that you necessarily don't have to tell her, but it's nice to talk to someone about that kind of stuff as well.
In your current situation, I'd ask her why the password changed all of a sudden. The fact that it's a "new phone" means nothing on the significance of the password. I'm not trying to say your wife is going behind your back, but if your relationship was open before and you knew her password, there is no reason why you shouldn't know it now that he's back in the picture. If she doesn't share the password with you, then I would get on the offensive. And if she DOES share the password with you but his texts start magically disappearing, the same applies. Hope everything works out and this is just in your mind.
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