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Old 08-05-2014, 03:54 PM   #10
Eŋg
rhyme capsule.
 
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the economy of language really does invoke zygote and his mechanical algorithm when he'd write. no bad thing. just naturally asks the question of whether or not you have a soul. i jest. the allusion of the intoxicated shift/amethyst line was clever. examining the morality of a fictional universe's anti-hero and the surrounding cast of characters in the play is a novel idea. also a reimagined narrative. not reimagined, more like rehashed. i thought, at times, you were going to delve into speaking more on WE, using the object of a sermon as a crooked mirror or skewered looking glass to consider ourselves. ultimately, i don't think you did that. i don't know why you wrote this. it was insipid, if i'm honest. but if i can't personally see the point in it, i understand that doesn't mean it's without merit. similar to the amethyst line i mentioned previously, i enjoyed parts of this, but on the whole, it was bland and unappetizing. perhaps i've missed a greater insight or design of the sermon. or not. you can write, i just wasn't feeling this.
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