[IamBenT]

This was not an easy read for me...

Innovator - your verse is plagued with vague words and references, all leading to an unsatisfying conclusion to an unclear topic. Only after really sifting through did I start to get what was being talked about. I like a few of your images and your word choices, but the rhyme scheme didn't work for me and several of the bars seemed stretched.

Patrown - I like the idea here, of exploring what it means to be the parent of one of these crazy kids, and how violence clouds things, but some of the lines were poorly executed, and a few more multis and creativity would have gone a long way towards me enjoying this verse more.

Vote -Patrown because I just liked the verse more and thought it was the more complete of the two, but props to innovator for being innovative.