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Old 06-08-2014, 04:28 PM   #5
Zen
Arm the Homeless
 
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 4,102
Battle Record: 22-24


Champed
- Art of Writing League

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Vivid: Loved the humor in the beginning but then it got to the point where he found out he has cancer and he's like, well shit I betta call ma bitch. Didn't like that part...until I found out she has AIDS. It was refreshing then because the whole piece had a light hearted feel to it. Dudes double dying now. Sad, but kinda funny. Btw, that woman should be punched in the face.

Vulgar: This topic was made for you and you killed it honestly. You definitely had the better rhymes, especially in the first half. You set the scene very well with the descriptive language too which is what I think is your strong point. The serpents in skulls part sticks out to me. I hate snakes so you fucked up my day with that image. This was quality writing though. Best I've read so far this week.

V/Vulgar

Close battle here. Nice work by both.
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