cyph her: This was cool. Your style is nothing like anyone else here. The shorter lines added a unique quality to the story. The one problem I have with this is that the story progressed too fast. We start and the woman has left him which is where I thought your best writing was, but when he receives the note he does all the tasks and gets her back in no time. I would've liked to have seen more detail to the tasks being done other than "he fed a homeless man". Besides that complaint, this was cool. Nice work.
Certain: First thing I always notice about your writing is that you take a few lines to strictly set up the scene. You'll describe the room, the sidewalk, the doorstep, etc. and as a result you've painted the scene beautifully. I gotta point out something else I enjoy in this, and it's something that most people hate in topicals for no reason other than to complain: dialogue. The dialogue was natural and unforced. You wrote it like it was a real conversation, not as something you were trying to rhyme. Cool piece here.
V/Certain
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