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Old 05-18-2014, 09:01 AM   #4
timeless
past tense
 
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I feel like I've read Zyg's piece before. I know you had one up a couple weeks back, against frank? And then took it down and put up a different one. Overall I don't know how to feel about it, mostly your ending and how it relates to the rest of the read. Was a treat to see you come more flow and rhyme heavy this week opposed to essay form. War and Famine sections were dope. Was it vivid who said he's sick of hearing people say you write like cake? Either way I sense a chris black style this around. Like Zyg's, I don't know how to feel about this. I get what you were going for just felt it needed to be longer to match up to Zyg this week. Last bar was cool. Particularly this : "Who loses? We all. We fall together: the next trend.//Respect instrospection, the facade of social inspection." Not a bad read though, content wise. Vivid left me feeling incomplete, I have to give it to zyg for the more entertaining and well-rounded read.

V.Zygote
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