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Old 03-30-2014, 12:41 PM   #12
Just Write
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This was actually a lot closer than I think the votes indicated.

Let me first start of by saying I absolutely hated the number/moves listed throughout your piece zyg although I guess I know why you put them there, I just think it gets in the way of the actual piece and I ignored them anyways. Also I never click on added links so I didnt use that either. As for the story itself it was great, I thought it was well thought out and executed to a tee, I just wish the ending would have told us who won lol. Either way, great story. YDK, I see you elevating bro man. This was a great piece that could probably be a surefire win any other week but this week you went up against a monster of a Zygote.Yourfirst I think 6-8 lines were great and I think you might have been able to pull off an upset but Iit got a little juvenile/sloppy after that, I mean like the head of lettuce line ect just felt out of place. But like I said before I see you honing in on your shit and believe it or not I do look forward to reading your pieces every week.

Mvgt=zy
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