I can’t with you both LOL. This battle was funny to say the least.
JW do those sites exist? LOL I think you tackled your topic head on and your concept was clever in the beginning and in the end. While you managed to get your point across, I do not think this many lines was necessary. I got bored in the middle. Your mechanics are okay here and seem to be a bit more polished than that of your opponents. Tina pulled a fast one.
Patrown- youre a crazy mother fucker lol. I couldn’t believe half the shit you had me reading lol. Your piece has humor, fantasy and fetish I suppose LOL, however I feel that your introduction could have been a bit more centered about your topic with details to follow. You kind of dove right into the plot of your piece without dwelling too much on the scaffolding of it so to speak? I also feel your flow is not that polished like your opponents.
For enjoyment, patrown did good but my vote ultimately goes to
Just write for an overall more grounded piece.
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