First half was pretty dope man, wording needs a polish throughout though. Sounding more natural will intensify the verse and have it read smoother. I also feel the way you formatted the verse didn't help out the smoothness of the read, was dissonant and required re-reading in places. The flow was strongest in the first half and was shaky in the end which made the finale lackluster to me. Verses this short need to be consistent imo. Deff strong potential shown in your opener, the best is yet to come from you.
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