Gotta agree with Juan Carlos Paccito Machitto above - I also wanted more of the first section - but so! Who am I to dictate what you shoulda woulda coulda wrote?
The first section story telling was bang on point. Sometimes, you can think of a story to tell, but struggle a bit trying to articulate what's in your head, thus it doesn't come out right. You got it right here though. And the story came out perfectly.
I loved how you went onto the second section. The imagery shone through clearly with the descriptiveness of this piece. Brilliant work!!
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