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Old 03-10-2014, 01:58 AM   #10
King Ra.
The Throne, The Crown
 
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Nice match up early in the season. Just Write, when first reading your story, I was thinking you were speaking from a view of a little boy, so I was thinking, how could a little boy use such terminology to describe things as intricately as you did? But then the end summed it all up..... an imaginary friend. Great job. That end line was the icing on the cake (no pun intended). You did such a great job in your detail and imagery. I was very impressed with how smoothly this read. Really there isn't nothing to complain about. Great piece of writing. Pancake, a very interesting approach. As usual, your scheming was on point and you did a good job progressing the story withvyour descriptions. I would have to say the ending was a bit weird, "the end" clearly just that. I feel you could have done something more perhaps with this.

Pancake came with an unique approach, and a very well written piece but Just Write did the same, except I feel his story was more in depth and complete, whereas Cakes sort of bottomed out in the end.

MVGT: Just Write.
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