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Old 03-03-2014, 12:52 AM   #13
Diode
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sacrifice came at this from more of a prose perspective than anything.. which surprised me, given his audio talents and ability to rhyme at a far superior level than most text folks. he took the high road here, spinning a tale about an invented civilization and the irreversible decline to entropy. there were occasional internal rhymes and brief bars, but this read more like a story (and from a talented author at that) than a rhyme piece.

frank.. i've said it countless time. the guy knows how to grab a reader and build atmosphere. nobody else in the aowl can capture a scene or a character better than this guy. one small fact about a double switch being pulled in an AL farm system irked me, but that's just sports nerd rage. the mother didn't feel necessary to the story, though it needed a folly and frank delivered. the anticlimactic ending was a strength and played beautifully. neither win nor loss. dug it. as for its relevance to the topic however, i felt the connection was weak as the only thing that "fell apart" was the mother-son relationship.

still, story will always grab at my feels and sac's decision to write prose over poetry hurt his cause.

v/ frank
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