ZYG
'We need a new CEO. Doctrine and dogma is boring,
Fire and brimstone is just so one-thousand and fourteen.'
'Christ isn’t trending anymore, crosses and rosaries no longer sell,
In developing economies Allah and Yahweh are posting losses as well'
'You could have monetized the stages of life as separate add-on expansions,
With a DLC to release different emotions through several micro transactions'
To be honest, I could of just quoted the whole verse, from start to finish it
had me hooked with a very clever take on religion with that modern boardroom twist.
I wasnt overly keen on the Miley Cyrus line, for some reason I just found it, a tadd on the
corney side but other than that overall ,awesume 1st week showing.
Exoduzt
As a whole I did acually enjoy your verse, nothing as such really stood out to
me but as a story from A to B, yea It kept me reading. I wasnt sure what to expect
with the stranger aspect, the whole cheque thing did seem a little rushed. All the
emotion leading up to it made me feel a little cheated. Heartbreak etc then out popped
this stranger with a cheque. I think as the weeks come you will be defo, one to watch out,
Vote - ZYG
overall the verse that I felt won here.
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