Neutral, I liked your verse and felt disappointed in it. I thought the separation worked well, and the first two stanzas stood apart, but the third one didn't bring them home for me and I was left kind of puzzled. Although I really liked your style, having never read anything by you. Careful wording and diction that's specific to the topic, it just voerall didn't hit for me with this installment, but I look forward to reading more from you going forward.
Diode, this was interesting - although you can say relying on a story that's already been told is a bit of a crutch, the use of the Spanish and the diction really made it fun. I hated the opening (equally think/ equally rich)... but once I started getting the picture that it was Breaking Bad (metafetaminas), I got into it. I wasn't so much bothered by the Spanish, and I think that's an unfair criticism since Neutral's piece also opened with Hindu shit (don't tell me you didn't google "Yama"). I just had more fun reading Diode's and felt it connected to the topic better.
Vote - Diode
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